It’s not like he cared in the first place! His life was a trophy of disappointment. He is unreliable and I hate him for it. Four children later, our stuff auctioned twice and our dog dies because he was busy dreaming and ‘didn’t’ see the car zooming in the dogs direction, when he had supposedly taken the dog for a walk, what did he care? He wasn’t an alcoholic, he was worse. He was a pathological dreamer.
I think the only time he is aware of the world is when he has a bowl movement. But my struggling to keep us afloat, keep these children in school and manage our parents never ending demands always finds him unaware. Always surprised that someone was ill, or in need of an item or two to be fixed, bought or transported, how could that pass him by?
George, the thing that I live with, that is supposed to be called a life companion and my protector and provider….of stress, heartburn, heartache and a potential brain aneurysm is always dreaming up some project. “Baby I want to be a rally driver.” Dozer doesn’t even have a driver’s license.
“Babe we will get out of this mess once my advertising agency picks up.” That was 3 years ago, he had been open for a year and had only had two clients. Not a huge organization but two individuals who were lost and walked into his office by mistake. George’s work was sub par and disgustingly late. It cost us more in the long run because he had to refund the clients for a job poorly done.
Why have I stayed? I can lie it is because of the children, but the truth is I love the lame son of a gun. I know he won’t change. When he doesn’t annoy me I feel an overwhelming sense of pity for him.
I have intervened in his mess severally, but George is so blinded by his ‘dreams’ that it might take an asteroid landing on his head to come to his senses. And on the other hand, I am too lazy, too occupied with my children to pack up my bags and leave. I have a home I own and I am the one who wears the pants in this relationship. I can kick him to the curb. It is pity that is saving George from a cold hard wake up call in the name of divorce and losing custody of our children. The one thing I can give him credit for in this marriage is the great looking African babies. That’s about it.